Re: nightmare on babble street » Jai Narayan

Posted by Susan J on December 10, 2003, at 9:54:28

In reply to nightmare on babble street, posted by Jai Narayan on December 10, 2003, at 9:30:23

Jai,
I just wanted to say you are *not* a target, or anything like that. I *think* and I speak for no one but myself, that this is just an issue of identifying and respecting one another's boundaries.
>>I have intense emotions/reactions.
<<Yeah, me too. I feel for ya. :-)
>>For some reason I had the impression if there was anywhere I could be accepted for having intense emotions it would be here on psycho babble…hummm?
<<I think we all try really hard to accept others. I also think that there are difficulties in *only* communicating in writing, so people don't always know *precisely* what another person is saying/feeling...and feelings are bound to get hurt or misunderstood and all that. Which is why communication is so imperative.
>Wow who would have guessed…I so enjoyed Larry Hoover and wanted to share that with him….and I end up hurt and I end up hurting others….
<<Yeah, I think many people feel that way about Larry. He's a wealth of information on meds and alternative medicine and stuff, and he's also very knowledgable about interpersonal relationships, communication, and coping skills.
It seemed to me (again only speaking for myself) that you were flirting hard with him. Which is fine. But then it also seemed like he established boundaries and said he didn't want to be flirted with so hard. Which is fine, too. I guess the *honey* thing after he tried to establish boundaries *looked* like you were not respecting those boundaries.
It's very hard to determine intent here, we can only go by actions.
> I have a few questions. Do you see Larry as a victim? Are you rescuing him?
<<Nah, Larry's not a victim. I think the strain and tension of the thread became apparent to several people, and we want *both* you and Larry to be comfortable again.
Nobody's perfect here. Most definitely not me, so I don't know if I've helped at all with this post or made things worse. We can all learn from this place -- how to communicate better, how to cope better, how to care better.
:-)
Susan

Thread

I flunked internet dating kara lynne 12/6/03
...
jumpy stomach Jai Narayan 12/9/03
Re: gosh, I'm really sorry. me2 » Jai Narayan JadeT 12/9/03
that is so sweet. me2 Jai Narayan 12/9/03
Re: that is so sweet. me2 » Jai Narayan JadeT 12/9/03
Re: that is so sweet. me2 » JadeT six 12/9/03
Re: gosh, I'm really sorry. » Karen_kay six 12/9/03
Well said » six JadeT 12/9/03
Re: gosh, I'm really sorry. » Karen_kay Larry Hoover 12/10/03
((((Karen Kay)))) Dinah 12/10/03
nightmare on babble street Jai Narayan 12/10/03
Re: Jai? Dinah 12/10/03
boundaries on babble street » Jai Narayan Medusa 12/10/03
Re: nightmare on babble street » Jai Narayan Susan J 12/10/03
Re: please be civil » JadeT Dr. Bob 12/10/03
Re: please be civil » six Dr. Bob 12/10/03
Re: please be civil » Larry Hoover Dr. Bob 12/10/03
Re: ((((Karen Kay)))) Karen_kay 12/10/03
above to ((Dinah)) (nm) Karen_kay 12/10/03
Re: Karen , thanks » Jai Narayan Karen_kay 12/10/03
Thanks good advice, I'm listening...... (nm) Jai Narayan 12/10/03
thank you I totally appreciated your input (nm) Jai Narayan 12/10/03
Re: I've been there » Jai Narayan tabitha 12/10/03
I read all the signs wrong Jai Narayan 12/10/03
Well then you do understand Jai Narayan 12/10/03
Re: Well then you do understand » Jai Narayan tabitha 12/10/03
...
Re: therapy Jai Narayan 12/14/03

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poster:Susan J thread:287090
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031207/msgs/288332.html