Posted by Temmie on August 30, 2003, at 17:43:05
In reply to Re: On Falling in Love. On Paul and, oh dear -- long! » temmie, posted by fallsfall on August 30, 2003, at 17:05:23
Yes, Fallsfall. Important considerations! You're so right, and I must remember this, and consider that what I've been hearing from Paul, much of what I've been hearing from him, that it's not right.
I talked with him today. He's still living on the mountain top, with a phone that doesn't work, and someone stole his new bike and his backpack. He said he was so tired of people taking things from him ....
There's more to the conversation, but I won't recount it all here, other than to say that in response to one of my questions he said he had no friends, he was living alone on the mountain top; and sometime after this, that he was going to have to find someplace to live.
I wonder.
I wonder, when he calls after midnight, where he's been? It doesn't seem a reasonable hour to be "coming and going" from the mountain. Today he sounded depressed and near bottom.
Maybe it was the illusion, the "ideal" blooming all those years, that made me fall in love quicker, faster, deeper -- with something that wasn't real at all. Someone. You know what I mean.
In the meantime, I guess I *would* like to be swept off my feet (by someone healthy), but I'm through with the personals. It's too awkward, and too artificial. I'm glad I have my friends here, and perhaps I'm meant to be alone for now.
I keep thinking I'm not getting any younger ... I guess that doesn't matter. Men still seem interested, and guess what? I still find them pests, for the most part. Lastly, who cares aboug getting older (let me adjust the petals in my hair). Hopefully I'm getting smarter ... wiser ... better.
Much love to you. I hope your movie(s) and time with your friend are/were fun. I ended up going out for an icecream cone and falling asleep without the Xanax! All I need now is a good book.
XXX, Temmie
poster:Temmie
thread:255633
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030829/msgs/255726.html