Posted by Fallsfall on December 15, 2006, at 7:44:52
In reply to Thoughts on Suicide - Trigger, posted by Daisym on December 14, 2006, at 23:46:58
I only have a minute (or I'll be late for therapy!)...
I understand the place in your mind that Pseudoname holds. Can I hold another place in your mind?
4 years ago I was miserable - no, that is not a strong enough word - I was ... I can't even describe it, it was so awful. I was having suicidal thoughts all of the time, but I had also chosen a plan, and worked out all of the details so that the impact on those I love would be as small as it could be. I hadn't chosen a date, but I wasn't far from doing that. Life was not worth living.
Today, I am doing so well. I'm in school, my library is about to install a new circ system (and it was ALL my doing!), I have a plan for a thesis (I know, GG - I'm nuts, I don't have to do a thesis...), I know what I want to do for work when I graduate. I washed my kitchen floor yesterday and cleaned two bathrooms the day before.
I understand the desire to escape and not have to deal with all of it. But please hold this other image in your mind. That it is possible to move past that stage. That is it possible that life can be pretty awesome.
It is hard work. But it is worth it.
poster:Fallsfall
thread:713827
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061210/msgs/713877.html