Posted by corafree on March 20, 2006, at 23:28:04
In reply to Re: HAVE A SUICIDE PLAN » corafree, posted by SLS on March 20, 2006, at 20:32:54
I'm too spiritual.
I think I'm being persecuted. No, I don't hear voices or see things that aren't there. I just think that's my purpose for being here. To suffer so others don't. That's the way I am treated by my family (most of them) and old friends (most of them) .. and I didn't mean to do it!!!!! And they won't even forgive me if I ask. That's persecution and that's what I think I'm living this life to do. It hasn't stopped for more than a day for a few years now. Something will happen every time I get a little happy. Today it was my mother selling the 'very last evidence that my father ever existed'. Boy I'm so happy for her. You see, I need therapy. And I've called and called and called, and I can't get it. I did get a therapist. A tiny little girl who is all of 21 and nods her head w/ everything I say and says 'that must have hurt!" Well that's not good enough. I'm in here buried much deeper than what this nice young girl can find. Someone special, someone who can see past me, that's what I need. And, I got staffed w/ a 'little sweetheart of a counselor'! I must be 'appealing' five decisions currently. And already this place out here is growing to dislike me .. they say no, but I'm not stupid. I'm a hard one, I know. But why can't I be? Why can't I be? Why do I have to settle? Because of money. Money. If anyone can make any sense out of anything I'm saying, let me know. Everything is grey to me.
iloveyouall&ipromise'nohurtthyselftonight', cf
poster:corafree
thread:622576
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060318/msgs/622727.html