Posted by Racer on September 25, 2005, at 21:20:47
In reply to Can't sleep in my bed or bedroom - need advice, posted by jerrympls on September 24, 2005, at 23:50:25
I know this isn't going to sound all that helpful, but after a year or more of sleeping on the sofa with the TV on, in my clothes, no less, and really almost never going upstairs at all, I did manage to move back to bed. (Although I find I do still kinda limit the amount of time I spend upstairs. Might wanna talk to my T about that...)
Part of the reason that the TV helped me, I think, is that it attracted enough of my attention that I didn't end up ruminating myself fast awake. Just having something to kind of take my attention was enough to help me sleep.
Moving back to bed was very hard, I won't try to say otherwise. It was very well worth it, though. Mostly, I just decided I needed to move back to bed, and forced myself to go up there, put on a nightgown, and get into bed. I would try to get to bed earlier, so that I had time to wind down, which helped. I made sure I didn't fall asleep on the sofa -- now my husband does that instead, which helps make sure I don't, since the sofa's too small for both of us -- and I sleep in bed almost every night. (If I do fall asleep on the sofa, my husband likes to leave me there. No matter how many times I ask him not to. He's afraid I won't be able to get to sleep if he drags me upstairs to bed.)
Mind you, I was successful despite the fact that my Main Man has stopped sleeping with me -- the cat who's slept curled up against me virtually every night for the past 16 years won't sleep with me anymore. He used to purr me to sleep as though I were an orphaned kitten. So it's a tough change to adjust to, but I'm still able to sleep in bed now.
I do take a book with me, something that will take enough of my attention that I don't get to ruminating. I also do this thing that helps me a lot: I play a little daydream scenario in my head, which also relaxes me and avoids the rumination. Nothing too exciting, or it will keep me awake; nothing that relates to a monster from the Anxiety Closet; nothing that might make me want to go check a reference book; and nothing that might inspire me to get up and play with my 'personal pleasure toys.' Just a nice, easy day dream kind of thing: vacationing at a beach resort, with lovely weather, a quiet lagoon with azure water, etc. Or sitting curled up in front of a fire with a group of friends, talking quietly.
I don't know exactly what changed that allowed me to move back to bed, but I'm glad I managed it. I hope that something helps you. And I hope maybe something I've offered here can be part of your solution.
poster:Racer
thread:559269
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050922/msgs/559624.html