Posted by Dinah on June 23, 2014, at 13:29:50
In reply to Saw him, posted by Dinah on June 23, 2014, at 13:21:21
I think my post makes it sound more confrontational than it felt, to me at least.
I emphasized many times that I loved him dearly, didn't want to terminate with him, and was very much distressed that he had had to go through what he went through. We hugged at beginning and end. I cried throughout but didn't sob and didn't refuse to tell him what I was thinking. I never raised my voice or spoke with angry overtones. I think I sounded as sad and resolute as I felt.
I think he might have been upset or sad. But in words he validated my feelings entirely while not quite acknowledging any fault in himself.
I just needed information about things I had surmised, and I needed him to understand the depth of my pain. Even while I acknowledged that it mostly came from my thinking he cared for me more than he actually did.
I suppose my mild challenging of his passive voice was the closest I came to confrontation, and I wouldn't even call that confrontational. More of a reminder about taking responsibility properly.
It was eerily like my dreams. Sad, with lots of caring - probably even on his side.
I believe he cares. Just not enough.
poster:Dinah
thread:1067158
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20140310/msgs/1067264.html