Posted by workinprogress on November 25, 2008, at 14:16:09
In reply to Re: The L word with T? » onceupon, posted by JayMac on November 25, 2008, at 13:21:57
Jay-
That is so awesome. You sound so proud of yourself and you should be! What you're talking about, accepting it, letting her in...is SCARY SCARY SCARY. But oh so good. I spent a year swirling around feeling such strong feelings for T, but being so afraid of abandonment. Finally letting her in was terrifying and a slow process, but I'm so much more comfortable now.
Anyway, I'm really happy for you. You are lovable. And you deserve to both feel love for and from her. Good for you for letting yourself!
xo
WIP> I saw her yesterday and I know she reciprocates. I can feel it when our eyes meet. I can feel it through the way she acts around me. I have some major abandonment issues. Throughout much of my life, I felt unloveable. I didn't even realize this until I started seeing her. Slowly, I'm beginning to see that I am worthy of love. This is such a gradual process. I'm learning. It's a long process, but I figure there's no better time than now.
>
> My T is not perfect. I originally wanted her to be perfect. I'm learning that she doesn't have to be perect in order to help me. She just needs to be "good enough." She is definitely good enough. She makes mistakes and will continue to make mistakes, but that's ok. I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect (especially with school). Knowing that she is not perfect and is still successful is great modeling for me.
>
> It has definitely helped that we have similar interests. But I don't believe it's absolutely necessary in order to have a fulfilling relationship with someone. Similar personalities or polar opposite personalities, therapy and life are about how people relate to each other. It's the relatedness that matters.
poster:workinprogress
thread:864636
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081120/msgs/865213.html