Posted by rskontos on October 8, 2007, at 10:39:13
In reply to Re: P.S. » antigua3, posted by muffled on October 8, 2007, at 10:15:20
I am not brave either, I think I only trust T because a dear friend does. The little one in me will trust T because my dear friend S trusts her. Sally like us has her issues, is a doctor and has been in therapy for years. T is her patient so she knows T stuff. So only on that basis can I trust her with this stuff plus if I don't I might not be here. I might disappear. You guys know the feeling. It is too overwhelming and like T says dissociation stops working at some point and then you spiral. I am spiraling. Today I am in a weird place.
Do you guys notice different handwritings T said that is another very indictive sign. Each alter can have a different handwriting because most people handwriting basically stays the same with only variations if they are tired or sick. My handwriting have always been different and I thought I was weird. ONe of mine is getting closer to the surface, I can feel it now. It makes me nervous now. I am very nervous now. I am thinking my family will freak. But I decided I can't let that deter me. Even if after this is over I have to live alone. I have hidden long enough and conformed to enough people that had too much control over me. I am tired of living in shadows. Unless I choose to live there. I still have loads of conversation in my head. Probably always well. I thought everyone did. Little one demands it. Or she freaks and that isn't good. She is present alot. The one that is lurking near I am not sure I like her. So I am now brave, but I have to be ready if I can live and grow so that is why I feel I have to trust someone. I guess I am trying to say I have reached a point where I feel I must or else. You know. But I understand how some of the rest of you feel. It is so hard......
poster:rskontos
thread:786857
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070929/msgs/787848.html