Posted by inimitable on July 22, 2006, at 12:08:22
In reply to Re: as above, breaking my heart » raisinb, posted by crushedout on July 22, 2006, at 9:31:59
actually raisin, i had told my T when i first started feeling like this, and i didn't tell anyone else, except online. i have no friends and i didn't want my sisters to know, because what if....the totally impossible situation, what if my t and i DID get together (after i was done seeing him professionally) and my sisters knew he used to be my T, would they think he was unethical and turn him in to the police? so that's why i didn't tell them, also cause i don't really talk to my sisters about very personal things, and if i do, its my sister who believes in god (although i DON'T) and i wouldn't tell her about this situation cause i think she'd freak out and start praying for me and all that jazz. my other sister i have told, just this past week, but i don't get personal with her at all really, just the facts, yes, i am infatuated with my T and it's torture. i didn't get into details about how the torture feels (i want to rip my eyeballs out so i don't ever have to look at my T again, see his cute face and hands...) so it doesn't really help much to talk about it with her. but i do talk about it with my T, and this unscheduled appt that i HAD to have with him this friday really helped, because i told him everything. and i thought i had been telling him everything, but i hadn't. it's not as if i lie in therapy or anything, i tell the truth and get fully involved. but i didn't really let on how much this situation was killing me inside. it was a great release to finally tell him how much i think about his face and lips and hands and eyes....to finally tell him the details of this torture.
anyways what i'm trying to say raisin, it might be embarrassing to tell your t, but this is what she's getting paid for, to help you through any problems you might be having in life, right? it will make you feel a little bit better at least, to let it out and let her know, if she handles it well, which i am sure she will. i mean, my guy is a grad student, not even a real psychologist, and he is handling it very well!
i hope your situation gets better, it won't go away, but i hope it gets a little better. i used to think that my situation would just go away if i tried hard enough to stop thinking about him, but it didn't work, much to my dismay. anyways i am going to stop writing now, cause now i'm starting to think of him again! i am going to try my DBT skills now!
*inimitable
poster:inimitable
thread:668993
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060721/msgs/669351.html