Posted by Dinah on July 21, 2006, at 12:11:37
In reply to Re: Paying to have my heart professionally broken, posted by crushedout on July 21, 2006, at 12:02:41
Aye, there's the rub.
But that's what we go to therapy for.
For me, to some extent, it's simple acceptance. Like understanding that my tendency to play the little girl is part of the reason my husband plays the Daddy, so if I want him to change I need to change myself. Or to realize I'm putting myself in a situation where no matter how hard I try, I can't win. If I accept that, truly accept that I'm not going to buck the odds, it's easier to let it go. Because isn't part of the attraction the potential that if you just try hard enough you'll be the exception? And that will prove something to you? That you're special, maybe? At least that's the pattern with me. And therapy especially is geared to give you the idea that you're at least partly succeeding, thus hooking you into trying harder.
My problem is that I generally succeed to a limited degree. The fact that I succeed is enough to keep me trying. The fact that I only succeed to a limited degree keeps me from being happy with what I do accomplish.
poster:Dinah
thread:668954
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060721/msgs/668988.html