Posted by Dinah on July 3, 2010, at 8:00:58
In reply to I don't want to carry on esp. this way warn. SI, posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on July 3, 2010, at 0:24:55
Maybe this isn't the way to carry on. You were looking for a woman in a place where finding a good man and settling down isn't really the purpose, and using money to attract. The chances of finding someone who cares about you personally in those situations isn't all that high. Her behavior says nothing about *you*. It has to do with her job.
It's a place to go to, for wont of a better phrase, enjoy your sexuality. I've gotten the feeling from your recent posts that this is something you wish to do at this time. If what you want is attention, buying it from women who are employed giving attention to men is a good strategy. You just have to remember that when you're in that situation, the attention you get comes with a rather concrete price.
If that isn't what you want at this time, a change of fishing grounds might be a good idea, and a change of bait might be a good idea. If you want someone who cares about *you*, starting with someone you aren't paying is a good idea.
Jay, is it at all possible that the testosterone is driving your behavior right now? And the depths of your pain and rage? I try never to make permanent decisions when I am on a medication that I think may be affecting my outlook. Testosterone has a well known record of influencing mood, and not all for the better.
I'm sorry you've been hurt. I know that even in paid relationships real feelings can crop up, and I know how painful it can be to have a reminder that without money that relationship will end. But the intensity of the pain does pass eventually. I know that too. When it does, you'll be in a position to evaluate your goals right now, and figure out the best way to achieve them.
Is therapy, perhaps with a male therapist considering the testosterone and all, an option? At the very least, could you talk to a doctor about whether the testosterone could be making you feel worse right now?
I don't want you to be in such pain, Jay. I've known you for a very long time. I'd like better for you than for you to bankrupt yourself for attention and sex, when what I wish for you is caring and genuine affection.
Please see a doctor and look into the testosterone. I know you've liked the effects, but possibly there are effects that are hurting you right now.
And if you think you're in immediate danger, please call the emergency room. Can you talk to anyone in your family about helping you?
poster:Dinah
thread:952957
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20100528/msgs/953101.html