Posted by AdaGrace on June 10, 2005, at 10:03:28
In reply to Birthday blues, posted by gardenergirl on June 9, 2005, at 20:55:10
Everyone has a story don't they. I think you will find that there are more of us out there who have experienced some of the same or similar things you have. Doesn't make it better, or diminish your own pain, but it does seem to help when someone else understands and has been there.
I am sorry your birthday was so crappy. Mr Man should have been more caring and sensitive instead of selfish. Good grief, he was holding that grudge against you for his birthday for a year? Boy, you said it when you told PC that he "had issues". But don't we all.
I find that my Mr. Man also tends to have problems with me being happy. Happy that is with other people. Can't laugh too loud on the phone, he might be feeling left out. I liked what Dinah suggested about yours trying to keep you down. It could be, you know. I've often wondered that about my own situation.
Anyway, paybacks sure are hell. Lording guilt over you is just as bad. I think I would probably get back in the marital swing of things with my own little personal revenge tour.
Suggestions for GG to gain her status back on the Birthday Queen pedestal:
(Note: These should probably be done in private and not told to the recipient)1. Drop his steak on the floor and put it back on his plate. (Now if this were at my house, that would have to be a chicken leg. Poor people have poor ways.)
2. Use his toothbrush to clean the gunk out of your jewelry. (Or the toilet if you dare!)
3. Hide the remote and say the kids/pet (insert appropriate scapegoat) must have lost it.
4. Add rubbing alcohol to his after shave lotion. Don't be shy, that old addage that a "little dab'll do ya" just doesn't apply here.
5. As a matter of fact, use his razor to clean the fuzz balls off your sweater. Be sure to get all that fuzz out from between the blades, you don't want any tell tale signs of anything being amiss. By the way, this one should probably be done before #4 for the most effective results.
6. Wait until he is taking a shower, and decide that the whites need to be laundered......in VERY hot water. "Oops, your didn't realize he was in there"
7. Sprinkle lots of talcom powder on fresh new sheets, don't rub it in. Men hate pungent smells, he might have to go to the couch for the night.
8. Decide that everyone in the house must go on a diet, remove all sweets and fattening things from the house...or better yet, just hide that stuff in your closet so you know where it is when you need it......replace with not fat cheese, milk, you name it....."make it so".
9. Start a new tradition of "YOUR" house being the place for your friends to gather and have a weekly facial/nail/hair "Girl's Night In" party that lasts for several hours. This should probably be done on an occassion when you know he will be home, and preferrably in his way. Like say, the living room. You should probably let the air out of his tires so he can't escape. (Babblemail me for foolproof and non tracing instructions)
And last but certainly not least,
10. Have a perpetual headache. Now do I need to eeesplain dat to ju Lucy? Lets face it honey, sometimes the only way to get back at a man is to do it without them knowing it, but having the satifation that it was done. I find witholding sex tends to work more often than not.
Now, GG, go out, get a pedicure, buy a new summer purse &/or shoes and a bottle if wine. Go home and prop your feet up, admire your new toe do, and plot your next move......."Zippity do da, zippity ay, my oh my what a wonderful day........"
Signed Me,
The Deviant One.....(used to be full of Grace)
poster:AdaGrace
thread:510246
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050610/msgs/510493.html