Posted by partlycloudy on February 2, 2005, at 13:02:00
2nd bad day in a row. Not handling work well; had a simple task to do today and I worried about it all night. It is such a little thing and my mind is blowing everything up into enormous proportions. I got the task done first thing today and I'm still worked up over it. I imagine that I have no credibility.
My therapist keeps rescheduling me without a second thought and I can't even tell her how upset it makes me, because I hardly know her and she says, "well, things happen; stuff comes up".Babble is really only a part of it.
I can't cry here at work, I can't. I'm supposed to be all better after being out for 2 months on sick leave. There's nowhere for me to go to collect myself. There is no collecting possible right now. I'm shattered, fractured, blowed up real good.
I cranked up my white noise machine until it sounds like the ocean is lapping at my desk.
I deep breathed until I saw stars, then forgot what I was doing and held my breath like a pearl diver.
I went out at lunchtime to run an errand and my road rage seethed; I hated the people standing in line in front of me at the store... it is all no good, no good today.Angel Girl, forgive me please for being so forceful with you. It's the last thing either of us needs.
poster:partlycloudy
thread:451758
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050202/msgs/451758.html