Posted by octopusprime on November 12, 2004, at 20:25:35
In reply to Looking for advice - Gross warning, posted by Dinah on November 12, 2004, at 17:53:07
(((dinah)))
this must be so hard for you.
that said, i think your plan (of talking to the doctor, then mom's family and pastor) is a good one.
best to start within the family and then take the hard line route.
can you speak privately with the caregivers that currently attend to your father's needs and ask if they have referrals to other organizations that can help?
your mother's behaviour is certainly shocking and weird. i can kind of empathize with her in a way - her husband is getting sick and dying, she doesn't feel like she's in control of her life, she's losing her health. your mother is digging her heels in and exerting the only control she can over her life, which is over how she spends her money. as disconcerting and awful as her behaviour is, in a way i can rationally understand it.
so i hope persuasion works. maybe stage an intervention? it might be more effective if your dad agrees that he needs more care, and can "gang up" on your mom with other agreeable and trustworthy relatives and friends. it's your dad's money too, and spending it on his health and comfort is worthwhile.
ps - how are the puppies? hug them for me. i am having puppy envy
poster:octopusprime
thread:415167
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041105/msgs/415225.html