Posted by B2chica on June 11, 2004, at 12:59:18
In reply to Re: Racer and Antigua....any better? » DaisyM, posted by antigua on June 11, 2004, at 12:17:51
>They are so well adjusted that I just watch them w/awe. My husband had a happy childhood and he has been my role model w/the kids. I don't know the rules, so he has been my guide. Things that seem perfectly normal to me are totally bizarre to him.
-This really resonates with me. i don't yet have children, but i sometimes watch my husband and his family with this awe. It's almost as if i watch them to see how i'm really supposed to be? My husband and i were just talking (arguing) the other night and our views were like day and night. Things that are normal to me are like a (and i quote) 'freak show' to him. that it's "just not right". this frustrates me beyond words, but i think cuz a part of me gets confused, it's all i've known.
> But then again, my husband thinks he's perfect and his standards for me are beyond my capacity at the moment.
>He doesn't understand what I'm going through--he really tries, but it's just so foreign to him. He doesn't say, "why don't you just get over it," but he lacks an innate compassion about the suffering.-Bingo. i had to look at this twice to make sure i didn't write this. He just doesn't understand at all, but the problem is he understands when it's convienient for him. If it doesn't effect him he says he's "there for me". But if it interferes with a social event or something then i'm just "doing this to torture him".
I know he really is a good man, but he doesn't understand what words do to me.Please Antigua, just keep in your mind those beautiful gifts your children. one of the other responses mention that they would rather have a sad mommy then a dead one...they were right on. they need you. and please check in with a new pdoc cuz medication changes may be the answer for you.
know we love and support you here.
Please take care.
b2c.
poster:B2chica
thread:355479
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040611/msgs/355770.html