Posted by noa on April 26, 2004, at 18:28:38
In reply to Re: Mother Question - Was I Right or Was I Wrong? » coral, posted by Susan J on April 26, 2004, at 14:27:04
>>That's the main problem, I think. She's miserable. She's inherited a dog from my brother and she just HATES dogs, but she thinks it's cruel to find the dog another home. I know it's painful to do so, but I told her the pain of that is less than dealing with the frustration and misery every day. I even volunteer with a pet rescue, so I know how to find the dog a good loving home....
OK, so she gets herself into rather impossible situations--very self-defeating, setting herself up with this dog (even though you can find a more than suitable home, like you offered), perhaps she's even got a touch of martyrdom there maybe? Or maybe--is this the brother whose marriage just broke up rather traumatically? Maybe she holds on to the dog hoping that the marriage will be repaired and things will go back to "normal" (if there ever was a 'normal')?
And then in the interaction you describe, she was making it impossible for you to resolve the tension that occurred there between you.
ARGGGHHH. The kind of thing that drives me nuts.
And let me repeat--you don't deserve to be yelled at, even by your mother.
poster:noa
thread:340233
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040422/msgs/340324.html