Posted by Shar on March 11, 2002, at 12:18:27
In reply to Re: Am I overreacting too?, posted by KB on March 11, 2002, at 10:01:36
Well, damn. Damn, damn, damn. I have had that identical experience (except for the dialogue).
I hate that you have to experience it.
I FINALLY got to a place where I asked myself about the level of self-sacrifice I would be willing to give for the few crumbs of attention that got thrown my way. And, then a while after that, I decided that I deserved better than to be treated so rudely, uncaringly, dismissively.
All this was accompanied by a great deal of crying over the loss, over the 'what might have been,' over how my heart ached and feelings hurt.
I figure you can lay it on the table, ask for honesty, follow your intuition, or keep doing what you're doing. One caveat: actions truly DO speak louder than words.
One other thing I try to remember: don't cast your pearls before swine.
Take care.
Sometimes I still cry, but I'm happier over all.
Shar> Yes, I meant that for PSB. I know exactly what you mean - I've had friends like that, too - even though they always seem happy to hear from me when I call and we have good conversations, always being the one to call makes me feel like they could do without me, which sucks.
>
> I gave in last night and called, since Sunday is usually our time (however brief) together - it was about 10:30pm and I was wondering whether to go to bed or wait up. The dialogue went like this
> (abbreviated version):
>
> M: How's the new cat?
>
> K: Heliotrope hasn't had the kittens yet.
>
> M: Heliotrope? I didn't know you'd named her that.
>
> K: That's because we haven't spoken since I got her on wednesday.
>
> M: I"ve been upstate with my college buddies all weekend. I thought I told you that.
>
> K: No, you didn't.
>
> M: (to someone in the background: checkmate) I'm playing chess with my friend Jim in Astoria.
>
> K: (Absorbing the fact that Jim's apartment is at the opposite end of the City and so M. had no intention of seeing me or calling me) Well, I guess I won't distract you from the game.
>
> Few minutes of random chat as I try not to cry, followed by heavy sobbing once I was off the phone.
>
> So now it seems I have 3 options:
>
> 1) have no further contact
> 2) write a letter
> 3) call and discuss it either on the phone or in person
poster:Shar
thread:19628
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020305/msgs/19632.html