Posted by Anna Laura on June 27, 2001, at 2:25:09
Hi all
I talked to my pdoc (he is a psychopharmacologist actually) yesterday afternoon.
I was supposed to call him to tell him about the effectiveness/side effects of the drugs he prescribed me weeks ago. Since i didn't get any benefits, i was quite sure he was going to make me switch the actual drug regimen and put me on another one.
He told me i had to stand up and react instead. I told him the drugs made sleepy up to the point i was barely able to do my job: he told me it wasn't the drug but me being bored from what i was doing instead.
He told me i had to work hard on myself trying to find some kind of stimulus and appealing/interesting things to do in order to switch my state of mind.
I told him that since i was anhedonic i was not enjoying anything whatsoever, so that it was unlikely to find appealing things to do.
I didn't like his attitude also: he sounded like a parent scolding the daughter.That really p***** off. When i hang up the phone i felt kind of guilty and responsible for feeling anhedonic.
Right now i'm puzzled: is it really my fault?
If i make efforts and i go out at night
instead of staying at home i don't get any real benefits; Sometimes i don't even talk to friends and get absent-minded instead. That's because i'm so bored of everything! Most of the times i end up longing for bed or laying on the couch watching tv.
What do you think? Am i really supposed to strive to reach out for appealing things? Should i be forcing myself to do things or do i need another kind of medication instead? My personal insight is that i need to find a drug to start me up: i feel like a car that needs to be pushed in order to get the engine started.
I' don't believe in the magic pill, i know i've to work hard on myself also, but i need to get started up first in order to do things. I believe my anhedonia being out of control so far.Any input will be appreciated
Anna Laura
poster:Anna Laura
thread:6843
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010622/msgs/6843.html