Posted by seldomseen on November 13, 2008, at 6:18:31
In reply to My therapist office was locked., posted by seldomseen on November 12, 2008, at 19:17:30
Thanks to all for your posts.
I think this so hard for me because there is no logical reason that I should have freaked out the way I did.
My logical brain is having a hard time grasping and not judging my reaction.
But my reaction was very real and very very painful. I felt so small and so alone there in those few moments before I saw him. It rocked me.
Frankly, I just don't know what I can do to make this attachment to him more secure. I want ot beat this so badly, yet there I was - alone in the hall, looking at that damn door and my mind immediately went to worst case scenario.
I suppose it is a good thing that at least I care enough to be hurt by this perceived threat.
My T said that these old old patterns of fear and hesitancy are very hard to break, but that we've already busted through a lot of them. The attachment pain and fear is the deepest of them all, but is actually the key one to be addressed.
Yes, I am exhausted. Yes, I do feel sad. Overall, I feel shaken and stirred. I suspect this going to get a lot worse before it gets better.Oh yeah, therapy is great!
Seldom
poster:seldomseen
thread:862657
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081104/msgs/862759.html