Posted by Poet on April 23, 2005, at 12:34:05
In reply to middle of the night musings...., posted by shrinking violet on April 23, 2005, at 3:27:51
Hi SV,
I was up until 2 a.m. central time, again I should have been online, not lying on the couch with the TV remote. My sleep in a bottle was alcohol, I reserve Ambien for work nights. Not good either way, really.
I wish you didn't equate peace with death, but I would be a hypocrite if I said I didn't think of it the same way. I am better than I was a year ago, but so much is still the same that it counteracts the so called progress. I can understand why feel that it was time wasted, because things feel the same.
I hope when you finally fell asleep that your dreams were pleasant ones, that you hugged your T and felt some closure. I know how awful having to end therapy is for you, why you are feeling so bad about what you should or shouldn't have done. I wish we all could go back in time and re-do things, knowing what we did wrong the first time, but I think we can only do that in our minds. Try hard to think about how hard you did work, even if right now you see little progress, okay? You are not a failure, you have great worth, it's just buried beneath a lot of pain, that I am magically wishing away for you.
((((((SV))))))))
Poet
poster:Poet
thread:488248
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050420/msgs/488321.html