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Re: Anybody afraid of growing up? Trigger » pinkeye

Posted by Dinah on April 18, 2005, at 18:24:16

In reply to Re: Anybody afraid of growing up? » Dinah, posted by pinkeye on April 18, 2005, at 14:15:55

Well, it isn't what you deserve.

I'm always sort of stymied when confronted with cultural differences. There's something in me that freezes, afraid of cultural arrogance or something.

But...

Is it equally ok for the women in your culture to be violent toward the men? And if not, what is the logic? If people are hit because they're bad, aren't people of both sexes known to be bad? If men can lose control, can't women as well?

Clearly I might not understand. But... If I were considered something that could be beaten by the people who were supposed to love and protect me, I think I'd feel terrorized and angry as well.

My mother lost control before she ever hit me. She never hit me when she was in control. That just made it way scarier for me. I'd have far preferred a cool headed spanking.

My father yelled and threw things, but he never ever hit anyone or any dog, other than a few swats on my tush that didn't really count as spanking much less beating. He lost control, but never lost control of that.

I've lost control enough to scream at my dogs till my face turned purple and I thought I was going to have a stroke. But I don't hit. And I don't scream at my son like that. So I think even allowing myself to scream was a choice I made.

I guess I have a hard time seeing hitting as something that isn't a choice.

But I guess I've also led a fairly sheltered life.

 

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