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Re: OK, oldsters...a call for advice

Posted by allisonm on April 10, 2005, at 10:50:38

In reply to Re: OK, oldsters...a call for advice » allisonm, posted by Shar on April 10, 2005, at 0:19:20

Hi Shar.

Thanks so much for writing.

I guess I'm thinking that I'm feeling bad because life isn't going real well at the moment. So does that mean that the chemical imbalance is worse too, or just that life sucks more than usual? If it's just life that sucks more than usual, should I adjust the drugs to correct the chemical imbalance more? Is the greater-sucking life causing a greater chemical imbalance? Or is the increase in Zoloft going to buffer the sucky life like ativan muffles anxiety and despair? Is that a cop-out to buffer yourself all the time from a life that has taken a downturn? Shouldn't I just pull myself up by the bootstraps and try to change the sucky life by myself without chemical help? That's what I mean by cop-out. What is chemical imbalance and what is life circumstance?

I'm 43, so I think my metabolism might be changing, also wreaking havoc with the weight issue as you mentioned.

I don't think I'm gaining weight on purpose to get out of the relationship. He's hard to get along with sometimes, but there are a lot of things I like about him. I don't think I'm tired of him. He doesn't know about this forum so I can say anything I want.

Your point about stepping back and seeing what I'm getting from the relationship is right on. My psychiatrist has been asking me that for months and months.

Still, there are a lot of aspects about him that I've not found in others. Some of them might be attributable to his Aspergers. He has a sweetness about him, a gentleness, a gentle sense of humor, a deep love for animals, lots and lots of creativity, a sharp wit, a unique outlook about the universe and how things work in this world. Also a certain kind of charisma.

I don't know. It can be a real joy to be around him. It also can be hellish. I've read this from other writings of spouses and SOs of people with AS. I guess I need to decide if it's something I want to put up with.

Thanks again for writing.

alli


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