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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 176 to 200 of 304. Go back in thread:
Posted by Bobby on April 14, 2009, at 23:53:30
In reply to Shame and Self Loathing, posted by verne on April 14, 2009, at 12:43:44
I enjoy your posts Verne-----you're not afraid to speak your mind and mixed in with the mean words are things I sometimes think to myself. The only problem is that --say a man hits his wife----but always apologizes later--genuinely---that still doesn't take away her black eye. And things like that have a tendency to escalate. I've seen it happen enough to know the pattern. I believe Bob's on to something. I don't think folks want to see you stop posting--just seize the chance to redeem yourself and I'm cheering for you. Good luck in your quest for sobriety--or at the very least moderation----though I think that may be unrealistic for some. Keep posting---everybody loves an underdog.
Posted by 10derHeart on April 15, 2009, at 18:42:43
In reply to Re: *Trigger* Jade's Final Post, posted by JadeKelly on April 13, 2009, at 21:38:33
>I sent some form of this to Administration addressing all members. Not one ever mentioned it to me privately or publicly.
Jade,
I can't speak for Racer or Dinah, but I'll speak for me. I would never mention anything a poster chose to tell me privately, in public. As for privately, I'm sorry if my not responding to your Babblemail gave a negative impression. It wasn't my intention. Perhaps I should have, to say I was sorry you had to go through such pain in life. I think sometimes I think people just know I'm sorry, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't go ahead and actually say it. That maybe was a poor choice. I know I really want people to respond to me when I reveal personal things. I will say, in explanation, that there are several reasons I often won't respond to posters' emails. Some of these are: I forget, I can't find the time and then I end up being embarrassed so *much* time has passed, I don't understand the message, or, I flat out don't know what to say. Also, being a deputy, my actions and words seem to carry a different sort of weight, so sometimes - wrong or right - I choose not to respond at all, feeling it will actually be more helpful that way.
>They don't talk to me.
Again, just replying for me, I don't really talk to anyone off the boards. It certainly hasn't got a thing to do with *you.* Except to answer a Notification, or other question put to me in my deputy role. Or perhaps to briefly respond if someone Babblemails me in my non-deputy role, which is fairly rare. It's partly a case of time-management of IRL stuff (I spend way, way too much time online avoiding the anxiety of RL responsibilities) and also something I've found necessary to function as a deputy and even as a regular poster, in some cases. Keeping everything as transparent as possible seems best.>10der has made it quite clear that she doesn't like me(I'll be generous).
I am bewildered. It isn't true that I don't like you. I don't know you.
Posted by raisinb on April 16, 2009, at 14:12:54
In reply to Re: why we are here » Dr. Bob, posted by myco on April 12, 2009, at 15:20:51
If one disagrees with a law, one doesn't necessarily go out of one's way to help one's friends follow the law.
If I'd lived during J*m Cr*w and opposed it, I wouldn't have expended energy on herding my African American friends to the back of the bus.
I happen to trust the deputies and support their decisions. But I felt that your post contained some odd logic.
Posted by raisinb on April 16, 2009, at 14:13:42
In reply to Re: why we are here » myco, posted by raisinb on April 16, 2009, at 14:12:54
Posted by garnet71 on April 16, 2009, at 19:14:18
In reply to sorry myco above for Dr. Bob (nm) » raisinb, posted by raisinb on April 16, 2009, at 14:13:42
Has anyone thought about the first thing you see when you visit the homepage of this site?
"Now, how are we to recognize Nature's most excellent web sites? ... whatever does not kill them makes them stronger. --Friedrich Nietzsche, Ecce Homo (adapted), 1889"
...just wondering. lol
Posted by Phillipa on April 16, 2009, at 20:02:47
In reply to this website, posted by garnet71 on April 16, 2009, at 19:14:18
Well doesn't the meds board have some outdated info. New meds to add? Phillipa
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 16, 2009, at 21:01:25
In reply to Re: why we are here » myco, posted by raisinb on April 16, 2009, at 14:12:54
> If one disagrees with a law, one doesn't necessarily go out of one's way to help one's friends follow the law.
Maybe not, but would one want one's friends to go to jail?
Bob
Posted by fayeroe on April 16, 2009, at 21:24:27
In reply to Re: why we are here, posted by Dr. Bob on April 16, 2009, at 21:01:25
> > If one disagrees with a law, one doesn't necessarily go out of one's way to help one's friends follow the law.
>
> Maybe not, but would one want one's friends to go to jail?
>
> BobBob, have you ever heard of beating a dead horse?
Posted by Sigismund on April 17, 2009, at 0:23:26
In reply to Re: why we are here, posted by Dr. Bob on April 16, 2009, at 21:01:25
>Maybe not, but would one want one's friends to go to jail?
Some countries try alternatives.
Shoot them on the beaches. Probation.
Posted by raisinb on April 17, 2009, at 9:37:13
In reply to Re: why we are here, posted by Dr. Bob on April 16, 2009, at 21:01:25
Yes...I love torturing my friends (sarcasm :)).
Obviously nobody wants that. But just as obviously, that isn't the point. You don't "herd" people you care about into following a law you don't agree with. You support them while they protest with you, and you do whatever you can to get them out of jail if that occurs.
To me, it sounds like a lot of posters are looking for policy change. So, I guess I don't know that you'll get that far trying to get them to aid you in enforcing the policies under the guise of "supporting others."
I haven't personally had major trouble with current Babble policies. But it looks like a lot of people do. I think it's gonna be hard for you to recruit them into recruiting others to follow policies that they fundamentally disagree with. I posted because I found that "move" kinda fishy, honestly.
Posted by muffled on April 17, 2009, at 10:14:49
In reply to Re: why we are here » Dr. Bob, posted by raisinb on April 17, 2009, at 9:37:13
Posted by fayeroe on April 17, 2009, at 10:20:14
In reply to Re: why we are here..horse beating here..... » Dr. Bob, posted by fayeroe on April 16, 2009, at 21:24:27
Bob, you have the attention span of a gnat when it comes to the administrative side of Babble. I've seen you post one line here and not return for 45-60 days.
I think that this is an experiment. Otherwise, you'd drop this.
I can see you now....sitting in front of your computer, rubbing your hands together..chortling in the dark.
I don't know why we try.
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 10:33:34
In reply to Re: SUGGESTIONS-ANOTHER FALSE ALARM » Dr. Bob, posted by JadeKelly on April 5, 2009, at 21:35:53
> I think I just threw up in my mouth. Dude, you got issues.
>
> Are you insane? No really. You are creeping me out.Please don't post anything that could lead others to feel accused or put down.
But please don't take this personally, either, this doesn't mean I don't like you or think you're a bad person, and I'm sorry if this hurts.
More information about posting policies and tips on alternative ways to express oneself is in the FAQ:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#civil
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/faq.html#enforceFollow-ups regarding these issues, as well as replies to the above post, should of course themselves be civil.
Thanks,
Bob
PS: According to the formula:
duration of previous block: 2 weeks
period of time since previous block: 2 weeks
severity: 2 (default)
block length = 3.83 rounded = 4 weeks
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 10:33:45
In reply to Bob's attention span » fayeroe, posted by fayeroe on April 17, 2009, at 10:20:14
> Some countries try alternatives.
>
> Sigismund> > would one want one's friends to go to jail?
>
> Obviously nobody wants that. But just as obviously, that isn't the point.
>
> To me, it sounds like a lot of posters are looking for policy change.
>
> raisinbThe point of this site is for posters to support each other. It seems to me a straightforward way of supporting each other would be to help each other avoid being blocked. But as we're seeing, there are other dynamics at work.
I'm disappointed that Jade wasn't able to avoid being blocked, but here's another opportunity:
> Bob, you have the attention span of a gnat
>
> fayeroePolicy change can be important, but that and supporting fayeroe aren't mutually exclusive. And policy change isn't necessary for there to be fewer blocks. You can be the change you wish to see. Show other posters how they might interpret things more charitably. Encourage them to apologize. Suggest they not address those they can't get along with. Help them avoid being blocked.
Bob
Posted by fayeroe on April 18, 2009, at 10:53:59
In reply to Re: an opportunity, posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 10:33:45
~~ The point of this site is for posters to support each other. It seems to me a straightforward way of supporting each other would be to help each other avoid being blocked. But as we're seeing, there are other dynamics at work.
I'm disappointed that Jade wasn't able to avoid being blocked, but here's another opportunity:
> Bob, you have the attention span of a gnat
>
> fayeroePolicy change can be important, but that and supporting fayeroe aren't mutually exclusive. And policy change isn't necessary for there to be fewer blocks. You can be the change you wish to see. Show other posters how they might interpret things more charitably. Encourage them to apologize. Suggest they not address those they can't get along with. Help them avoid being blocked.
Bob
Bob, I'm sorry that you don't understand the situation. Several posters here have tried to tell you how they feel about what you've tried to get us to do and it's obvious to me that we're missing the mark with you.
I'm sorry.
Fayeroe
Posted by muffled on April 18, 2009, at 10:59:01
In reply to Re: an opportunity » Dr. Bob, posted by fayeroe on April 18, 2009, at 10:53:59
< And policy change isn't necessary for there to be fewer blocks. You can be the change you wish to see.
*thats not what we been talking about here....
Boat sailed w/o ya Bob.......
M
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 13:36:26
In reply to Re: an opportunity » Dr. Bob, posted by fayeroe on April 18, 2009, at 10:53:59
> > And policy change isn't necessary for there to be fewer blocks. You can be the change you wish to see.
>
> thats not what we been talking about here....
> Boat sailed w/o ya Bob.......
>
> muffledThe policy boat can't sail without me, but the support boat can. But some posters may prefer to sail with me.
> we're missing the mark with you.
>
> I'm sorry.
>
> FayeroeThanks, that's a step forward. What mark do you feel you're missing?
Bob
Posted by fayeroe on April 18, 2009, at 14:25:36
In reply to Re: an opportunity, posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 13:36:26
> > > And policy change isn't necessary for there to be fewer blocks. You can be the change you wish to see.
> >
> > thats not what we been talking about here....
> > Boat sailed w/o ya Bob.......
> >
> > muffled
>
> The policy boat can't sail without me, but the support boat can. But some posters may prefer to sail with me.Policies that are inherently unfair won't be supported by some people. Hopefully you will grow to accept us.
>
> > we're missing the mark with you.
> >
> > I'm sorry.
> >
> > Fayeroe
>
> Thanks, that's a step forward. What mark do you feel you're missing?
>
> BobBob, this can be an ideal time for learning for you. You need to figure it out for yourself.
I don't feel that we're actually missing anything for us......you're missing what we've been trying to tell you. My remark could mean that when we've shot towards the target....it isn't hitting (you).There is a saying about people who might be a little dense about some things. "You wouldn't know it if it hit you in the ***." I know you're book smart but I don't think you're "heart" smart.
And I am going to tell you something. Today is the first game of the NBA playoffs. Cleveland is my favourite team because I love LeBron James. I am watching the game. My lost cat is home.I have more important things to do than piddle around here.
This is my last contribution to
this thread.Hear that noise? That is a coke can opening!
Have a great weekend and talk to your T. I bet you'll get some help on what we're trying to do here. :-)
p.s. you did miss the boat, you know! muffled got that right!
Fayeroe
Posted by Sigismund on April 18, 2009, at 15:26:07
In reply to Re: an opportunity, posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 10:33:45
>The point of this site is for posters to support each other. It seems to me a straightforward way of supporting each other would be to help each other avoid being blocked. But as we're seeing, there are other dynamics at work.
Really? Oh my goodness!
Posted by raisinb on April 18, 2009, at 17:57:38
In reply to Re: an opportunity, posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 10:33:45
"The point of this site is for posters to support each other. It seems to me a straightforward way of supporting each other would be to help each other avoid being blocked"
Yes, to #1. And it looks to me--on the boards I visit--posters are supporting each other heroically. Which is wonderful.
However...#2 doesn't logically follow. It only works when you assume everyone fundamentally agrees with the policies being enforced. When that isn't the case, it may feel to posters as if they're facing a common dilemma of the powerless--like Indians recruited to help the British Raj by keeping their fellow Indians in line. Or the Jews running factories and work camps under the Nazis (obviously these comparisons are inflated, but they're the ones I could think of to explain the point I was trying to make).
I think the problem with the logic here is that helping you enforce your policies is not "supporting" those who run afoul of them. Empathy, communication, reassurance, and checking in on other posters is what constitutes support. Looks like we are all doing that all the time, which is why I love Babble.
I think we're all looking for the same thing here--fewer missing loved ones and a safer Babble (since I don't know what's in your head, I am assuming a charitable interpretation). There is a good deal of finger-pointing going on on both sides of this conflict, and I do think individual posters need to take responsibility for their own actions.
However, greater power=greater responsibility. Turning the responsibility for resolving a conflict over to the less powerful--while retaining the power--is, as I said, a highly fishy move.
Posted by muffled on April 18, 2009, at 18:02:54
In reply to Re: an opportunity, posted by Dr. Bob on April 18, 2009, at 13:36:26
<The policy boat can't sail without me, but the support boat can. But some posters may prefer to sail with me.
*The support boat keeps getting shot at by the policy boat. We tried to negotiate w/it, to no avail, they wouldn't listen. I can't stand the carnage. I used to try and shoot back at the policy boat, but then there was more fighting.
So I grabbed a life jacket and jumped ship, I swam for shore. It was a hard swim, but I made it.
I still cheer for the supporters, but from a distance. There's more lifejackets, so they can swim to shore too.
Some don't seem to mind the shots fired. So they stay.
Me, I need a more peaceful place.
Though I miss my friends.
M
PS, and FWIW, the captain of the policy boat seems to go missing from time to time.....noone on his boat knows where he goes? So maybe the policy boat don't saail w/o you bob, you own the boat, but I bet sometimes your crew would like to know where the heck you are when storms arise...
So captain Bob, I prefer not to sail on your boat. I don't like the rules aboard your ship. Too tough.
On the support boat, we don't keelhaul or walk the plank.
Mebbe we snarl some, or send a mate off to their cabin to cool down for a bit, but thats bout it.
Jesus talked in parables alot.
Smart guy.
M
Posted by muffled on April 18, 2009, at 18:05:53
In reply to boating on babble, posted by muffled on April 18, 2009, at 18:02:54
on my eeepc.
wasn't ready to post.
but its good enuf.
nice day.
goto go out to my yard.
best wishes to all.
you too bob, even though I don't wanna go on your boat don't mean I don't like you or think you a bad person.
happy sailing.
;-)
M
Posted by Sigismund on April 18, 2009, at 18:14:54
In reply to Re: an opportunity » Dr. Bob, posted by raisinb on April 18, 2009, at 17:57:38
>However...#2 doesn't logically follow. It only works when you assume everyone fundamentally agrees with the policies being enforced.
Yes, and apart from that it's just not possible.
If someone writes to me and asks my opinion about a post I will give it. But people I don't know well, and people I do as well, are not going to take kindly to me saying 'I think you should do this', as if I really know anyway.
There is a very limited influence we have on each other at any one time.
Posted by Sigismund on April 18, 2009, at 18:16:58
In reply to boating on babble, posted by muffled on April 18, 2009, at 18:02:54
>The support boat keeps getting shot at by the policy boat. We tried to negotiate w/it, to no avail, they wouldn't listen. I can't stand the carnage. I used to try and shoot back at the policy boat, but then there was more fighting.
So I grabbed a life jacket and jumped ship, I swam for shore. It was a hard swim, but I made it.Bless you, Muffled.
That was wonderful.
Posted by rskontos on April 19, 2009, at 17:07:35
In reply to Re: This speaks so much. in case you missed it., posted by muffled on April 13, 2009, at 11:28:45
>>Yet expressing his annoyance in a way that fits w/in the guidelines...?
LOL, uh oh! My less charitable self is thinking vindictively HA! NOW maybe he knows how it feels...
whilst my kind self feels very guilty...
Sigh.>>Hey Muffled,
While I agree with almost all you said, I felt I had to point out that Dr. Bob called us a herd. I don't think that is civil yet he did not rephrase it like he asks us all the time. To rephrase, to be civil. I am not a cow or a horse or any other animal that is part of a herd. With all my issues, I would freak out in a herd.
anyway, I feel this discussion with Dr, Bob has degraded into a weirdness thing that is quite weird. This 'game" crap is another part of said weirdness. I just can't think of any thing else to call it but weird or a freak show.
My t is a p-doc and I don't think he would every digress to this point.
JMHO
rsk
ps I do watch Tara
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