Posted by 10derheart on August 25, 2014, at 17:54:45
In reply to Re: back to school tomorrow, posted by ClearSkies on August 25, 2014, at 7:04:19
Aww...thanks. You are too nice.
College is not for everyone. I forget, though I think you posted about it before,....did you want to go badly but couldn't due to MH stuff? Or am I mixing you up with someone else?
I think college has always been for me, but about 12 years back I had what I now know was a minor panic attack working on my first assignment when I tried to take just one class...and the thing wasn't even due for weeks! I recall deciding I could never do it before I'd started! Sheesh. At least I did get a ADD dx after that, but the anxiety part was never addressed properly.
I do love it...the books, the information, the interaction, the atmosphere, etc. It's just that when having to buckle down and read and write on someone else's schedule, sometimes I just wind myself up and go off spinning like some blubbery, middle-aged blob of insecurity. Then later I think things like, "It's just a paper/quiz/worksheet..whatever, not life and death, 10der, in a few months it will be meaningless...get your priorities straight!" Maybe that concept will sink in this semester.
I do know where the resources are, yet, the doing is always the wall I cannot climb alone. I live it all out in my head, imagining conversations, practicing phone calls, etc., then chickening out. I'm so very sick of that part of myself.
Thanks so much for replying. I mean to reply to you and never get focused enough...grrrrr.
MDD (presently in complete remission); ADD-Inattentive type; mild anxiety (not fomally dx'd)
Meds: Strattera 80 mg q day
poster:10derheart
thread:1070265
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20140718/msgs/1070289.html