Posted by alexandra_k on September 27, 2010, at 6:32:10
In reply to Getting there..., posted by alexandra_k on September 27, 2010, at 6:09:30
People do seem to feel bad. I guess because for them the gym is one of those things they feel they 'should' be doing - but they just don't want to do it. For me... Work has become that. So I feel bad for spending so much time at the gym and they say things that make me feel worse, because they are trying to help themselves feel better about not going, I guess.
I feel like it is extra important for me to eat properly since people are keeping their eyes out for the 'bulking up' that they have convinced themselves I must be wanting to do since I'm lifting heavy weights - right? If I get all sumo looking then they will feel better about themselves... People don't get that fat is about eating crap not about training. Or that most female bodybuilders (who are natural and don't take steroids) look positively normal (porn star-ish) off season when their bodyfat levels are higher. Even though bodybuilders train differently to me with higher reps at lower weight to build bulk rather than lower max effort attempts (oh the irony in how we tell women to train!)
Hormones going slightly crazy... I've been trying to look into this but no luck. Hard... Lots of stereotypes about lifting weights making you fat or bulky or masculine. Lots of countering those stereotypes with counter-examples. But then... The reality (for me)...
I get kinda mildly manic when I'm in a heavy lifting (for me) phase. In the sense that I don't want to sleep much. Guess that is okay since I normally want to sleep much more than is good for me. I don't want to eat much... So much easier to eat light (for me) meals frequently (which is also good for me, I guess... Feel... Really confident. Grandiose. Though maybe (for me) confidence appears grandiose because of my weird psychology... I'm not sure... But I feel pretty good knowing that most of the guys at the gym couldn't hurt me if they tried. I could snap them like twigs. Now that feels empowering... Not that I would. Just that I could. If they tried something on...
Sometimes it is like being on speed or something... Only nice instead of not nice hallucinations... Pretty sure they are hallucinations but not 100% sure... People talking about me at the gym (admiring). I can't tell. Weird space... And if I really get into cardio (like 60 minutes interval training) then I just want to lie down all the rest of the day even though I'm not sleeping exactly... I dunno, hard to explain. Then I want to train twice per day...
Libido in overdrive... Especially around ovulation. I never used to flirt but I've started becoming a little flirty - and a lot with one guy in particular (who flirts back but freaks out sometimes - he has a girlfriend sigh). He was thinking I was leaving soon for med... Who knows... I don't know about him... I haven't felt this way about anybody in a long time, though... I'm not flirting with him (much) anymore, though... The whole girlfriend thing makes me feel pretty awful... Just bloody hormones and I forget myself sometimes...
Overtraining is controversial. Hard to know the difference between good for and overdoing. Fine line, I guess. Most athletes training would be considered excessive to others - but thats how come they excell. I was never one to be moderate...
Some lifters say that someone else comes out when its time to make a big lift. Thats exactly right. You know the technique... You know how to recruit things the way they are supposed to be recruited. Now its time to go bye byes and let someone else be present for the pain while you just do the darned lift already. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger etc etc. Or... What doesn't injure us for too long...
I dunno... But sometimes I really do think I'd be happiest DOING instead of THINKING. I'm so sick of thinking...
poster:alexandra_k
thread:963943
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20100907/msgs/963944.html