Posted by Verloren on May 29, 2010, at 5:41:12
Verloren is very angry at herself for wasting the money to fly "home" to visit "family". She feels guilted into coming by her grandmother because she didn't have the heart to say her budget was hurting and that she'd simply rather be in the comforts of her own home.
Verloren really dislikes this city on a normal day. Maybe it's pms or some other cause, but this weekend V is hating every moment.
She has only been in town less than 24 hours so feels there is potential to see improvement?????? But as of 5:17am has been awake for 2 hours since the neighbor's dog continues to bark and bark and bark and bark and it's actually driving V a little crazy.
She'd just go to a hotel, but the budget really can't allow that.
She feels sad for not wanting to be around these people, these relatives. But she doesn't know them nor they her and social niceties only go so far.She's feeling like running away from this. Dealing with her mentally disturbed sister, drunken family, What is that smell?, letcherous cousin, barking dog, terrible crime infested neighborhood, seriously the smell - it's awful, no transportation, no sleep, that smell is unbearable, a headache since she arrived, is it gasoline? Smells like gasoline, friend's mom is ill, smell is nauseating.
Hoping it gets better. Trying to resist calling Ada, her T. Verloren knows she would only find temporary comfort in hearing Ada's voice and advice on the situation. But longs for that gentle comfort, however fleeting, in a time when she is emotionally and physically worn.
Sorry for the third person perspective. Feeling disconnected.
poster:Verloren
thread:949365
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20100528/msgs/949365.html