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Someone I miss

Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on October 17, 2009, at 21:49:40

There's a person I started avoiding, well not avoid, I got afraid...but real people just don't run off. What happened was litterly a "nerve breakdown" I lost almost all functioning, I couldnt even speak...this was due to stress, over lapping alcohol. What I want to do, I saw this person and I don't know, I'm somewhere in life that i guess i'm happy for them, but i'm not happy (being saracastic i'm not happy at all) with the relationship, it just. There was alot of stuff that happened after this breakdown, taken off medications, and man you talk about feeling "awful", ugh! call the vet and put me down for 23.99...jk.

Anyone know how I can work this, now I've made a choice...i'm staying here until I feel i'm "strong" again to be around certain people, right now I don't have anything to even exist as person. I just have to build myself up again, and know that choices of tempatation [over-indulge and make quick choices that you don't really care to make].

I'm not disabled in alot of what people think I am, I've seen myself be confident and do things right, i think it just it's kinda like you make one mistake then it's a series of mistakes, so i "excluded" myself from both sides, family so I wouldnt make any friction and feel that i'm causing or influencing bad habit's, then there was the part of "recovery" I'm serious, nerve breakdown's happen, lose function for a while, it's like riding a bycile, you know how but all of sudden you forgot how to balance life.

So, I just know there is going to be faith in the future. This is just a blog. Thank you to my readers.

M


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