Posted by Dinah on July 17, 2008, at 10:27:53
In reply to Re: Why do people persevere? » Dinah, posted by Lemonaide on July 17, 2008, at 7:12:17
I think of severe hardship as a crucible.
You may have heard my theories on the crucible before.
Many pieces of clay go through the crucible and come out cracked but serviceable enough. Some pieces shatter. And some pieces come out whole, and stronger and harder than ever they would have had they not gone through the crucible.
But saying the crucible is a good thing, a strengthening thing, is ignoring all the cracked and shattered pieces.
My crucible wasn't so very hot. Yet I am cracked. Were my crucible more intense, I've no doubt I'd have shattered.
How did my ancestors get through that? I know that in the far far distant past, it was good for the tribe to keep around a few highly sensitive or very intelligent clanspeople even if they weren't terribly strong or brave. They could help figure things out, or pick up small changes that allowed them to "predict" the future. So the tribe made sure they were fed and watered because they were useful.
That was less true of my less far far back ancestors. I'm not so sure that it was of immense value in the middle ages. So how did the people like me survive?
I'm having increasing wishes that I was dead. Not that I'm suicidal or anything, I'm not. But more and more as the stress and anxiety and hopelessness builds up I think of death. Not because I'm depressed, but because I'm a coward. In this day and age, I'd have to go out of my way to die. In those days, you didn't so much. It'd have been pretty easy to die. So I still wonder why they lived?
poster:Dinah
thread:840086
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080702/msgs/840153.html