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Re: Online dating site horror story » Jay_Bravest_Face

Posted by Kath on June 21, 2007, at 12:07:11

In reply to Re: Online dating site horror story » Kath, posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on June 19, 2007, at 15:21:47

Jay - you sound like a real 'catch' to me!!!!!!!!!

Hey - don't despair - my husband was about 40 when we married & had never been married or had kids! I was delighted! I think women should be really glad to find someone who doesn't have the 'baggage' of ex-wife & kids!!

You know, I sometimes wonder how many 'healthy' people there are 'out there'. I suspect that a lot of women have radar for a certain type of person that something deep inside them knows won't treat them really well. My daughter used to be like that. She'd find really, really nice guys boring - or say there just wasn't alot of 'spark' or something. I think a lot of folks don't have a great self-esteem; maybe have been treated badly & think that's all they deserve.

My husband & I were friends before becoming romantic. I LOVE that! It's such a wonderful basis for a relationship. But I think a lot of people want sparkle & fireworks & to be swept off their feet first.

I still maintain that a great way to meet someone is to get involved in something you really like - photography; book club; movie group; sport group etc. That way you can meet people just as friends & perhaps get to know them & then see if you click with someone; go for coffee & see what happens. I am SO glad I'm not single. It must be so stressful to really want to meet someone; get married; have kids.

(An aside here - let it be know that if you have kids, please be aware that you do NOT know what's going to happen in their lives. Are you willing to put yourself into a situation where your - for example - 23 year old son has addiction problems, is on antipsychotic meds as a result, has considered living on the street - etc, etc. Obviously I'm describing my son. I LOVE him dearly, but would I have kids again? NOPE. Sorry to be negative, but I'm always open with people when the topic of kids comes up. On the other hand, you sound like you'd be a great dad.)

hugs, Kath

 

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