Posted by special_k on March 31, 2006, at 18:50:09
In reply to I've made a complete fool of myself, posted by Deneb on March 31, 2006, at 17:07:10
> I think I've made a complete fool of myself writing about loving Bob, and about the scarf. :-(
I don't think you have made a 'complete fool' of yourself. Really. It was nice to see you feeling happy and stuff. I was a bit worried about where it might be headed. I remember in DBT group they were trying to teach us about emotion modulation. The point to that is that it isn't just about learning to modulate the negative emotions, but it was about learning to modulate the positive emotions too. Why? Because unmodulated positive emotion... Can lead to a crash. And so it is more about learning to modulate both extremes. It is hard work though :-(
> I don't know why I couldn't control myself and just keep my thoughts to myself.Because you were feeling really very happy. And it was so nice to see you feeling really very happy. It was. You deserve to be happy. You do. I'm sorry. I think I have done badly. Sometimes (when I'm in a good place) I think I can be helpful sometimes. Othertimes (when I'm in a bad place) I think I can be more hurtful than anything. And I'm sorry for that.
But I guess I do think that you should rethink trying to give him the scarf. Why? Because it does symbolise one hell of a lot. And hence because whether he accepts it or not; whether he keeps it or not; whether he wears it or not; all of that has a huge symbolic meaning for you too... And it means more to you than it does to him... And it is a huge thing to place onto another individual. I don't know. I'm sorry.
> Now it might be awkward meeting Bob and the others.
Lol. I think it would have been plenty awkward anyway. Really. I think you will find that everyone is going to be worried about themself... About how they are going to appear... People aren't going to be worried about you half as much as you are going to be worried about you. Really. I think it is okay Deneb. I'd love to meet you one day. Really.
> What have I done? Every little idiotic thought that pops into my head I write about. Why can't I just keep things in like a normal person?
Yeah okay so if you ever manage to figure that out then let me know, because I do exactly the same thing. Ok? I think other people do too... Maybe harder for us 'cause of the stuff we get to thinking about... I don't know. ((((Deneb))))
> Please don't worry. I'm really quite inhibited in real life. I'm 99% sure I would never hug Bob or anyone else if they didn't want to be hugged.Lol. I believe you. I'm really quite inhibited IRL too. If I ever got to a Babble party I think I'd be the one staring at the floor hardly saying a word. It is different on the boards where people can't look at you and you can't see their reactions and stuff. I understand. I say stuff here I'd never say IRL. Not even to people here.
> I'm starting to feel the shame now, finally.(((((Deneb))))) It is okay sweetie. I don't think you need to feel ashamed. And I'm sorry that you do. I know some people don't understand (some people post asking if they are the only ones who don't get this kind of thing going on). But other people... I think other people do understand. It is okay.
> I need to help others out. Offer my support. I need to read more and yap less.
Me too.
:-(
I'm sorry Deneb.
poster:special_k
thread:627187
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060331/msgs/627231.html