Posted by sunny10 on May 12, 2005, at 8:47:57
In reply to Re: Synny » AuntieMel, posted by AdaGrace on May 11, 2005, at 17:47:52
In response, particularly to this...
> It's a natural feeling to be worried about someone who seems to be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire. I know I feel that way towards you as well. But I just wanted to say that even though I feel it is very possible that this man will hurt you again in the future, I realize and understand why you are doing what you are doing. Who knows right? Who really knows but you and him......>
I am counting on the T to know! I have already met with the T who will help both of us individually for anger mgmt, and then bring us together for couples counselling. I have told this T that I have serious trust issues at this point and that I am counting on him to help me see whether my SO is really committted to make things work with me IN A NON-MANIPULATIVE WAY or not. Of course the T said that he will help me figure that out and that he doesn't believe in charging money for couples counselling that is never going to result in a happy couple!I am truly not going in blind, here... I am relying on a professional, licensed psychologist.
Obviously, I do not live in a vacuum- I know about the cycles of abuse, Narcissists, et cetera.
I absolutely want to be sure that I am not planning a life with one of them. That's precisely why I'm bringing in the professional!Does that make anyone feel any better about my safety? To some exent, I AM jumping from the pan into the fire (maybe towards a truth that I don't want to see)... but I've got a fireman (the anger mgmt T) lined up to put it out if the fire spreads instead of going out on its own, and an EMT on standby to help me deal with yet another loss in my life if this doesn't work out with my SO (separate T).
Can you think of any safer way for me to get the answer I seek (one way of the other)?
If I don't try, I will feel as if I failed- I will also wonder for the rest of my life if I threw away slightly damaged goods that would have been perfect for me had they been repaired...
poster:sunny10
thread:496008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050503/msgs/496810.html