Posted by Damos on April 17, 2005, at 18:02:37
In reply to Re: In and of Itself.. Damos, posted by Susan47 on April 17, 2005, at 13:32:03
Time for a laugh.
I remember a psychiatrist telling me once I was 'supernormal' in response to a bunch of tests I'd done - of course he totally failed to explain what on Earth that meant.
There was someone else who after looking at some other tests said it was amazing to her that I could get up in the morning I was full of contradictions and conflicts.
Michelle (Katie's Mum) rang me about 12mths ago to say that I should see the Ted Bundy movie because there was a scene in it where she and her son looked at each other and said "That's Faulkner" (me). Now that was scary!!!!
The only reason I'm still here is because I forgot to feed my parent dog once-upon-a-time. Let's just say I was getting acquainted with a shot gun and she wouldn't stop scratching at the door. Suddenly I realised I hadn't fed her and so went and did it and somehow it was enough to break the spell. Been a couple of other nearlies but something always stops me.
Some people thing I'm as cold and hard as stone. They just don't see what goes on beneath - the depths of the turmoil. The way I just take anything that is beyond my ability to deal with and lock it down deep inside until I can, which is usually never.
It's easier to be what other people want and need me to be than it is to be me. I was also well taught that every thing and everyone came before me.
Something else. I can't deal with recognition, praise, the sopt light, success and stuff and so deliberately seek to be invisible. I've never got near my full potential in anything because I couldn't deal with the attention being really good brings. Hate it. Don't actually think I've ever done something just for myself, well except buy books and CDs. Don't know how.
Enough for now. Can't believe Alex is missing all this.
poster:Damos
thread:482887
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050408/msgs/485573.html