Posted by Dinah on December 12, 2004, at 14:11:47
As I've said in the past, I am worried about my ability to physically care for my father. Yesterday with the spectre of suppositories and breathing treatments, I began to think I might be able to do it. I spent hours yesterday sponging my father off to reduce his fever, and it felt more like caring for my son than my father. If worst came to worst, I might be able to change his diaper or give a suppository. I'm not sure what the emotional toll will be, because that probably won't show till later. But I think I *could* do it.
But my vomit phobia might get in the way of my caring for him in a number of circumstances. I can probably override it short term, but I don't want his health or life resting on my ability to override it, because I'm not that sure I can.
It's hard to find the sort of help he needs at home. I spent hours this morning trying unsuccessfully to line up someone for today after the support system my mother lined up failed as I predicted it would. She insists on looking after my dad with just her and a private worker, rather than an agency. That probably works out better than an agency short term. I like this woman. But she won't be here for Christmas, and in times of crisis, it makes it inordinately difficult to get anyone in. I finally decided this morning that if no one could come in, he'd have to go inpatient because I *couldn't* be relied on, as much as I'd like to be, when we couldn't find anyone.
This morning he had rallied enough that I guess it's ok for my mother to watch him. He ate a big breakfast, and doesn't seem to have a fever or severe trouble breathing.
But I don't know what to do. I want a grownup to tell me what to do.
poster:Dinah
thread:428314
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041209/msgs/428314.html