Posted by iris2 on October 9, 2004, at 21:00:07
In reply to Re: Lonely no one to talk to, posted by newwife on October 9, 2004, at 19:12:08
What is a screen name? I thought it was whatever name you were using for your IP or board. Like mine would be iris2 for pscho-babble.Also what does IM stand for? Internet me or meeting?
Honestly I got so depressed today I did not even talk or post much. I do not know why. It seems like the new med (over two months now) I started is not working as well. I think it has been gradual but I am so used to either giving into the depression completely or fighting it like mad. Since I felt a little better I have been fighting and in doing so getting out just a wee little bit more. My attitude has changed a lot. I always know if I am feeling better even if my adhedonia is still bad I am "happier". Happy is a very relevant term here. It makes a big difference in the quality of my life even if nothing much else changes. I do not work or function much.
Today I have been having more of a rough time. I still made plans to go on a rather long hike, for me, tomorrow and since I planned it with two other people I cannot cancel. I wanted to go but I can never seem to motivate myself to do anything especially if it is in the morning because I have a he** of a time getting out of bed. I did not even start to clean the clothes I need to wear until about an hour ago. I have to meet them at 8:30. I usually do not get out of bed until at least 10 and then I do not get dressed until sometime in the afternoon.
For someone who said they were not talking or typing I am doing a fine job of it:) Hope you find it amusing and not irritating. I will check out your profile on AOL when I figure out how. Maybe you can save me some time and anxiety and tell me how?
Are you blond? Born on 8/28? Or do you want to be blond 28 years old and have 8 million dollars?
I don't care what color my hair is except dirty gray which it is. I dye it close to its original color. I did not know for years what color it actually was exactly, but when I was at my Mothers one day she still had the ponytail that was cut off when I was 10. I could not believe it but my dyed hair was almost the exact color of the ponytail. The color of my hair now besides gray is mousy brown. Wow can I talk about inconsequential stuff.
I do wish I had more money. I live on SSDI. My family helps me out almost every month which is both less stressful and more. They do not ask much when I ask for money. I always tell them exactly what it is for. (They used to not trust me at all) Now I do not always feel so stressed and bad when I need to ask them. I always make sure it is medically related. If I am short for some other reason I overdraw at the bank if I have to and make it up the next month or two. I never ask them for money for things I want. My Mother and I have this tradition; she always buys me my bras and underwear since I was probably in my early twenties when I could afford them myself. I think she always kind of liked to live vicariously through me this way.
I am 45 years old and female. I have not worked in about two years. I have two dogs and they are my "boys". Not married and have never been. Nothing against marriage. Just never found the right person I guess. But then one has to actually walk outside the front door to meet someone!
My dx is atypical depression, bulimia and sometimes borderline PD. I think ADD should be added. I have a seasonal component to the depression. For several years my old therapist and I noticed that around or before Christmas I always ended up in the hospital. I have a light box which I never use. Must change that. I have been ill since I was 15 so it’s been a long hall. Sometimes better than others. As I get older things in general are not as important which makes it all a little easier.
Well now you know a lot about me.
Tell me about you?
What hours do you generally post? Mine change but I usually get up around 9 or so and check the messages and then at night usually everyone is asleep I check again and there is no one to talk to. That is okay I usually find something on TV.
Hope I did not bore you too much and hear from you soon,
irene
BTW I put this thread back on social because I am tired of being reprimanded.I just looked at this and it is really really long. Sorry.
poster:iris2
thread:400958
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041001/msgs/400958.html