Posted by TexasChic on June 25, 2004, at 9:15:59
In reply to Ever seen the movie Gaslight? » TexasChic, posted by Racer on June 24, 2004, at 17:42:55
Thanks Racer. You really gave me some things to think on. It's as if anytime someone challenges me on whether or not I'm over reacting, it just puts my mind in turmoil. I realize this for what it is, and know I should trust my judgement, but I guess my self esteem isn't quite where it should be in order to do that.
I have been working on this with my T, and she is very encouraging. She says she doesn't believe its possible for me to be *too* assertive.
But you're right about the validation. I never got that in this situation, and one of the things I'm trying to work towards is to still feel confident even if I don't get it.
I still feel bad and kind of stupid because apparently I started a big deal out of nothing. But the part about work has been on my mind for some time now, and I do believe my heart to heart with my boss really helped. The part I feel bad about is my friend could not figure out what on earth I was mad at her for, and then she got upset (probably because I do this all the time). So even though I still feel she was out of line about something she said to me, whether she meant it that way or not, I realize now I should have just talked to her. But it got all mixed up in the work situation and just became this huge mess.
Sigh. I'm just afraid she's going to get sick and tired of this whole mess that is me, and just want to get away from me.
One more thing, I don't remember ever being this bad about this sort of thing until I got on Lexapro. I'm back on Prozac now, along with Wellbutrin, but the out of control emotions just keep on coming. It makes me wonder if there's still a lingering effect of the Lexapro (I've been off it 3 or more months now), or if maybe its the Wellbutrin?
Of course there's also the fact that I had a big split up with someone I considered my best friend in the world, and I found out she had been hiding things that bothered her about me. So maybe I'm just reacting to that.
I don't know. I guess its just something I'll have to figure out for myself. Thanks for everyone's input. You guys help more than you know.
poster:TexasChic
thread:359724
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040619/msgs/360174.html