Posted by antigua on June 21, 2004, at 11:03:28
In reply to Re: Depression is not a vacation » Poet, posted by littlep24 on June 18, 2004, at 12:37:13
I have dealt w/my husband on these issues as well. Often, it's the small things, like the dishes or the laundry, that he feels the need to control me about (oh yeah, and a big one--Money!)and tell me how I should do everything.
Now, I love my husband, but I can't stand the controlling aspect. He spends too much time focusing on me and not enough on himself. I often felt like no matter what I did, it would never be good enough for him, or done the "right way", etc. I got really tired of feeling that way. So, I told him to talk to someone about it. He did and it helped tremendously. He can't fix me, he knows that now, and by trying to control me he realized how he was pushing me away. I've told him, "Hey, this is me, love me or leave me" (and I meant it seriously, as much as I care about him) because dealing w/him on top of the depression was killing me.
He still reverts to his old style under pressure, but I think he really gets it now.
Just wanted to let you know that maybe(?) there's hope.
antigua
poster:antigua
thread:356101
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040619/msgs/358581.html