Posted by Ilene on November 3, 2003, at 17:27:48
In reply to Strange feelings after death of friend, posted by NikkiT2 on November 3, 2003, at 16:53:48
> A friend of mine died yesterday.. I know her through Borderline UK (the charity I do stuff for), and she was one of our most hard working volunteers. She suffered greatly from her BPD, and struggled through each day.
> She was found dead yesterday by her ex husband. They are going to do an autopsy, but first indications are natural causes.. probably liver failure after years of paracetamol overdoses.
>
> Its really affected me strangely. Its not sunk in I think.. no tears or anything yet (I'm sure they will come at the funeral though).. bbut so many questions.. like, did she realise she was about to die, and did that knowledge make her feel any different about life.
>
> These questions feel so morbid, and not right.. but I know grief takes strange forms.. But still.. I feel very unsettled by it.
>
> Death is so damned permanent. I hate permanency.. Why can't we be given one final chance to say something to someone and ask any final questions??
>
> A shaken NikkiI've been thinking about how people don't know they are going to die. Obviously, many people do, but when death comes suddenly you wonder whether there was something different about that person, and most of the time the answer is *no*.
Half my family was killed suddenly and gruesomely 16 years ago. While I was cleaning out my father's house after his death this spring I went thru boxes and boxes and boxes of photos. I shouldn't have done that to myself, but once I started I couldn't stop. My niece was only 3 1/2.
Then there are the friends with whom you lost touch, or people with whom you meant to reconcile ...
Ilene
poster:Ilene
thread:276203
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031031/msgs/276210.html