Posted by KimberlyDi on September 19, 2003, at 15:21:12
In reply to Guilty happiness, posted by Eddie Sylvano on September 18, 2003, at 18:28:06
I'm in touch with my inner child. I am responsible, I work too much, but by George, I can also Play. My happiest moments are times spent goofing around with my son, when I make him laugh so hard he can't breath. My mother is disapproving. I need to "grow up". If growing up is being like her, stern & looking like she bit into a lemon, then i'll stay "immature".
I think that times have been so bad, that I can be happy at times that other people consider dull and boring. i can appreciate the sunlight.
Don't let them rain on your parade. even in your memories.
KDi in Texas
> Looking back on my life, it occurred to me that whenever I was really happy about something, someone in my life (father, ex wife) would snap at me, like I was goofing off or doing something stupid and wrong, which hurt. I'm reeeeally sensitive. It was much safer to be gloomy because then there wasn't anything to take away from me, or maybe I just didn't appear to be doing wrong if I were sad. It was safer, and I got left alone. I became much more concerned that they be happy, so I wouldn't get yelled at or roughed up. It's really ingrained in me. Now, if I can just undo that. Easier said than done.
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poster:KimberlyDi
thread:261446
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030913/msgs/261670.html