Posted by fallsfall on July 18, 2003, at 14:51:02
In reply to Lonely and Confused, posted by Temmie on July 18, 2003, at 12:07:08
Temmie,
You have accomplished so much in your life - starting with abuse, modelling, raising your son who wants to go to college, getting enough money to move out of your parents (even though you didn't), getting a degree at the age of 45, being in grad school, taking care of your dad. I'm tired just writing about it! I think that you are very much a success.
Money - just keep your eyes open for a full time job - your day will come.
Paul - It sounds to me like Paul has very big problems. It is one thing to have one court case (though, I've never had any, have you?), but it is quite something else to have two. One could be an accident, or a misunderstanding. But not two. Not at the same time. It also sounds like he isn't trying to help himself - drugs, alchohol, I don't recall you saying that he was in therapy. I don't know how to say this - please hear it with the idea that I am caring and concerned - I have heard that people who have been abused are attracted to abusive people - it is the way they know, the way they grew up. Please be careful.
Your dad - I almost answered one of your earlier posts, but I didn't know what to say. My dad was manic only once (hospitalized for 3 weeks), but the rest of the attitude is identical - he is the only one who knows what is right, if you disagree with him then you are not only wrong but you are stupid, everything has to be his way or he throws a fit, did you know that the meat, vegetable, and potato are supposed to be in a particular order on the plate? He is verbally abusive to my mother whenever she breaks one of his rules or doesn't anticipate a need. I know of no way (without destroying a 75 year old man) to have him be more compassionate. He's depressed (never figured out what "retirement" meant), but refuses therapy. When he was hospitalized he convinced the psychiatrist on discharge that he needed neither medication nor therapy. I don't see him a lot, but I do love him (I think the small doses help). I can't imagine living with him. If you have any great ideas I'd love to hear them.
You have so much going for you. You have accomplished so much. Keep making good decisions, and acknowledge what you have done.
poster:fallsfall
thread:243173
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030713/msgs/243220.html