Posted by whiterabbit on June 9, 2003, at 12:30:17
In reply to Lots of changes and upheaval at home, posted by bookgurl99 on June 9, 2003, at 4:56:36
It would be very difficult for you to stay together if she joins the military. You wouldn't see her at all for the first two months while she goes through basic training. Then, she'll probably be moved to another state for AIT (job training) and be confined to sleeping in the barracks for a matter of months, at least during the week. From there she could be moved to another state for OJT (on-the-job training)for a few more months, or straight on to her permanent
assignment anywhere in the US or overseas. Normally you don't have much choice in where you end up.Because the military does not recognize same-sex marriages, your girlfriend will officially be considered single and housed as such. This means that she will be assigned a room in the barracks that she must maintain, and she will not be given additional funds for housing and food. While you could live in a town nearby the base or post (and remember, she might be stationed overseas), she likely won't be able to contribute that much to your finances as a couple because military people just don't make loads of money, particularly the enlisted (as opposed to officers).
I know this is hard but if she does insist on joining the military, you might want to consider saving yourself a greal deal of heartache and end the relationship. It would be extremely difficult for you to stay near her while was active duty -
every couple of years you would be packing up and heading out for parts unknown, and each time you would have to find a new job and another place to live, it's a very transient life.Try to point her in another direction - there must be a better choice.
-Gracie, 7 years active duty Army
poster:whiterabbit
thread:232561
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030604/msgs/232625.html