Posted by noa on May 29, 2003, at 17:59:12
I find my boss being personally rather intrusive---bad boundaries.
Just curious. At your workplaces, if you are out sick, what expectations do your bosses have in terms of your availability to speak by phone during the day?
My boss ain't happy with me just leaving a message. She is extremely frustrated that I don't answer my phone (I tend to keep the ringer off and check messages when I feel like it). (BTW, I felt like telling her that it is none of her business whether I even OWN a phone or not!!)
And, my colleagues and I have just been instructed that if we're going to be out sick, we need to call her at home in the morning.
In this discussion today, she wanted me to call her at home in the morning, or at work, at a time when I would know that she would be at her desk, not just leave her a message "at dawn" (I tend to call in sick first thing in the morning, which is on the early side--maybe I should call her at home then! I know it is earlier than when she probably wakes up!!). So I said that that was asking a lot for a person who is sick enough to miss work to have to time themselves to catch the supervisor at the desk (and not on another phone line, of course). So she modified the demand to, "so, leave a message and give a time period when you will be available by phone."
Thing is she and other managers there have this totally distorted view of what is urgent and would require my input during the day. (btw--the managers' inability to triage what is really urgent causes other problems at work, too, as you might imagine)
To back up their demands, they both (immediate boss and next level up boss--don't ask--totally wierd hierarchy) cited their spouses' businesses, where people out sick communicate several times a day with the office. I can't argue them on those points--that may be the expectation at their spouses' businesses but I really don't know if it is considered standard to expect in most places of employment.
I know that in some settings, it would be reasonable--ie, those that handle really urgent matters. But for the most part this doesn't apply.
I know how I feel about this, but just curious how common it is for employers to expect live communication and/or consultation during the day when an employee is sick.
BTW--I suggested that if they have an urgent matter, leave a detailed message about it. That way, when I check messages, I will know if it is urgent. AND, I can respond appropriately even if unable to reach her directly by phone--ie I can email or leave info by voice mail that would help them deal with the matter.
The kicker is this: Immediate boss said that when I was out she was worried about me and was ready to call my brother (ie, emergency contact). I said, "while I appreciate your concern, I don't see why you would need to contact him. I called in sick each of the 3 days I was going to be out, and called in before my time to report for duty. It wasn't like I was missing." She then said, well, it was so many days--a Friday, the weekend, and two more days) and I was worried--not talking directly to you made me wonder if you were ok, etc. etc." So I said again the appreciate the concern thing, etc. but "you are my supervisor, not my friend. It isn't your role to check on me when I'm sick." At which point she conceded this part of the discussion.
But this is so indicative of her bad boundaries. I probably rubbed a wound by saying "you are not my friend" as I'm sure she wants to be everyone's friend, but it needed to be said.
About the other part--being avaialbe to consult, I said I understand what they are asking and need to think about how to resolve this.
It is really all a control issue. She is a control freak.
The irony of it all is that if she were any kind of competent supervisor who helped create a real team atmosphere and fostered my trust in her, I might want to try to comply with such a request, to the extent possible depending on the nature of my illness, of course. But she is intrusive and very bossy--bullyish in fact--and sets up these commands/demands that I (and my colleagues) feel very contrary to.
But I'm curious about what other peoples' bosses expect.
Thanks.
poster:noa
thread:230025
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030517/msgs/230025.html