Posted by katia on May 22, 2003, at 13:29:40
In reply to Re: Cutting, looking for answers.... « McPac, posted by audrey on May 22, 2003, at 10:56:45
> > > > Can someone here explain WHY you cut? Does it release tension or depression? Thanks.
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> Growing up, my parents used to scream at me all the time. I always had a really difficult time coping with this type of reaction to things. My parents yell at each other even when they aren't angry -- one of my friends said my parents reminded them of George Costanza's parents on Seinfeld. Anyway, there were times when they would just keep screaming and screaming at me, and there was just nothing left to scream about, but they wouldn't let me leave the room. And so I couldn't take it anymore and I would be hyperventilating and my mind would sort of go numb and I would suddenly be curled up in a corner tearing my hair out in clumps and clawing at my throat or the skin on my arms until I was bleeding. It was just a way to escape the hell my parent were causing. The worst part was that my parents would actually laugh at me and tell me I was being "ridiculous." It took a long time to get over all of that stuff. Well, as over it as I can possibly be at this point. I mean, even now, at the age of 28, things will set me off, and I'll find myself pulling little bits of my hair out, or scratching at my skin until it is raw, and I don't even realize I'm doing it. It's not nearly as bad as when I was a child or teenager, but I do regress. It's frightening.
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>My god, how awful for you. I'm sorry anyone had to go through that.
Is there a history of mental illness in your family?
poster:katia
thread:228095
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030517/msgs/228355.html