Posted by whiterabbit on April 24, 2003, at 9:00:05
In reply to Re: lost sailor--sienna and all, posted by lostsailor on April 22, 2003, at 23:10:50
It sounds like a grand opportunity. I understand your apprehension perfectly, last August I did back out of a trip to the east coast for my sister-in-law's wedding, I had a plane ticket and everything. (This was probably the last straw for my husband - putting up with my irrational behavior - but I still don't regret it. There would have been another "last straw" somewhere shortly down the line.)
But the circumstances were different. I would have liked to go to the wedding, but what I couldn't endure was almost 2 weeks of living with my husband's family, people I don't know very well. I'm notoriously private and require great blocks of solitary time to maintain my sanity.
It sounds like you would be among friends at the wedding, and then you could retreat to an empty house when you needed the down time. Don't worry so much about appearing "different" from your former self in front of old acquaintances. In the first place, I suspect that we are often clueless about how others really percieve us, so there's no use in trying to maintain a certain image that
is probably incorrect to start with.Then there's the most basic truth: everybody changes. Everybody will be different, not just you. Still, there is absolutely no need to talk about yourself and your present circumstances if this would make you uncomfortable. How do you avoid that? It's easy. People LOVE to talk about themselves. A good part of the time, when others ask you questions about yourself, what they really want is for you to hurry up and finish talking so they can talk. It's relatively simple to be considered witty, charming, and popular.
You encourage others to talk about themselves and you listen when they talk. Bingo, you're a hit.Lord aren't I the wise old owl this morning. This is great, I can turn my head all the way around to look at the telly without moving my body.
Do what you feel most comfortable doing, dear.
-Gracie
poster:whiterabbit
thread:221053
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030421/msgs/221963.html