Posted by paxvox on March 10, 2003, at 14:57:45
In reply to How do you deal with workplace bullying?, posted by Alara on March 10, 2003, at 5:29:52
Having read through the other posts to follow up your message, I found I agreed with most of what was said. Bullying has dramatic pyscho-social implication to both the bully and his/her victim. In "life" when I was a scrawny teenager, I was bullied by this one fellow for months. He was stonger and bigger than I was. Even if I had the courage to fight back, I would have gotten whipped. However, what I did do, I think, would apply to just about any instance of bullying. It has some inherent risk, but is better than just letting the crap continue. Your response is simple to do, just HARD TO DO. That it is work-place environment makes your solution easier. Here is the answer:
Stand your ground and demand that the person immediately desist from the bully behavior or you will go to the boss to file a harassment charge. Your employer (at least in the U.S.) is charged with providing a hostile work environment. As a matter of fact, it is Federal law in the U.S. Tell the bully EXACTLY what he/she is doing SPECIFICALLY, then go to your boss and tell him/her exactly what you told the bully, and that you are making a formal complaint against him/her. By so doing, you have laid the burden of protection on your employer. It is an old adage, but a bully WILL bully you UNTIL you stand up and say ENOUGH! They will not stop because it is no longer fun no matter how long you ignore it. Until you make a stand, you will ALWAYS be a target. Once you have said "STOP!", you have drawn the line. You may think this makes you weak, or a sissy etc....On the contrary, it takes boldness and courage to make a stand on this or any issue. You cannot lose unless you play his/her game by exchanging words or physical blows. Then you both lose (your job in many instances). Remain civil, but be firm, direct and to the point. "Hey you! I've had ALL I'm going to take from you about this! You either stop RIGHT NOW, or I'm going staight to the boss to file a complaint against you!". There, it's that simple. Now don't delay another day. DO IT the very next time the snake opens its mouth. Hope this helps, I'm pretty sure it WILL work.PAX
poster:paxvox
thread:207679
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030308/msgs/207782.html