Posted by Dinah on January 4, 2003, at 10:12:32
In reply to Re: Sigh » Dinah, posted by Noa on January 4, 2003, at 9:25:28
I know what you mean. With me it's the abandonment fears rather than the internal critic, but it doesn't take much sometimes to wake them while at other times I'm more robust. I sometimes think it has more to do with finding an excuse for the biological processes, and we use the excuse we are most familiar with.
Getting a bad evaluation hurts, I know. Even getting a good one with a "but" in it sends me spiralling. And I'm a crier too, which makes it uncomfortable for all. I guess the difference is that my moods are very short lived. I have "learned" to take these naps. When I get upset, I can fall asleep for as little as 45 minutes and when I wake up I've either forgotten what upset me completely, or it seems very far removed and vague. I know this isn't terribly healthy, and I forget more than what upset me, and it leads to an unstable sense of self, but darn it it works and I'm not motivated to change. Your way of dealing with it directly sounds so healthy in comparison, even if it is a bit passiva agressive.
My therapist has been in this office for the eight years I've seen him. I too look everywhere but his face. In fact I'm never quite sure what he looks like and can't picture him in my mind. In my pre-trust days I told him that it was his office that was helping me, and if necessary I could just pay to sit in his office. But every piece of that office except his desk (which I am uncomfortable looking at) seems so familiar and comforting to me. I hope he tries to arrange things similarly in his new office.
poster:Dinah
thread:34471
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030104/msgs/34532.html