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Courage Tina

Posted by Greg A. on December 2, 2002, at 13:29:31

In reply to Another suicide guys, posted by tina on December 2, 2002, at 8:44:24

Tina,

Over the past weeks I have moved closer and closer to having ‘that kind of courage.’ Utter hopelessness, a weight of anxiety and tension that seems to grow each day, completely worn out from fighting this disease with not a shred of improvement to show for the effort. I am frightened though – frightened that I won’t be able to do it. And also frightened that I will succumb in a moment to total desperation and weakness, and go ahead.
Last week, a friend told me that I had to get through this because my daughters would be forever scarred if I don't make it. I know she is right. I tell myself that I cannot live another day like this, but I struggle through. A week has passed. I find that deep down I have a faint glimmer of hope left, that I can be helped. I thought I had left all hope behind. For now, I have resolved to stay here. Right now, for me, that takes more courage than swallowing a bunch of pills.


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poster:Greg A. thread:32914
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20021120/msgs/32926.html