Posted by Ritch on January 26, 2002, at 22:00:52
In reply to Therapist wants Suicide Agreement (not to), posted by Shar on January 25, 2002, at 22:12:48
> My therapist is beginning a group in Feb. that I want to be in, and wants me to agree to a one year commitment to the group, and that I won't commit suicide during that year.
>
> I've been seeing her for 10 years or so; this isn't a new therapeutic relationship, but it is the first time she's asked this of me before I joined group therapy.
>
> I understand her reasoning (she explained) but I am having a hard time giving up the option of suicide. I have always had a lot of ideation, but do not make suicidal gestures. However, if I commit to NOT do it for a year, I'm very big on honoring my commitments and won't do it.
>
> Aside from the "you shouldn't kill yourself" stance, does anyone have experience with this in therapy, or comments?
>
> Thanks,
> SharShar,
This may sound strange-but *not* wanting to give up the *option* of suicide sounds a lot like people trying to quit smoking cigarettes who find that ultimate absolute *never* command so authoritarian and unrealistic. I used to smoke 3 packs of smokes a day for several years and that was the *one* thing that bugged me so much when I tried to quit-that idea that I could *never* smoke a cigarette again. Obviously, the *option* to once again smoke a cigarette or kill one's self never disappears. It is like seeing it as a "mirage" of free will-when the free will NOT to do something self-destructive was always there.
Could you tell us your therapist's reasoning? Just curious.Mitch
poster:Ritch
thread:17208
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020125/msgs/17246.html