Posted by sar on October 10, 2001, at 1:24:43
so i'm on the telephone with my wrong-side-of-the-tracks friend that i met in the psych ward over the summer, and i'm asking that he score me enough heroin for 6 people, when finally he gets to the root of the matter and suggests that we off oursleves together with a gun. i'm in the middle of explaining to him that i belive suicide is a solo mission and that i want an easy drug-induced death rather than blood and guts, whem my friend rolls up in her new car and we spend the evening shopping at the mall, and i buy i skirt even though i think that next week i'll let this psych-ward friend of mine score me enough drugs to die, and this isn't a message of alrm but rather, do you often feel this way?--here i am depositing my checks, brushing my teeth, clocking in; here i am with a great boyfriend and painting my toenails and buying new undeez but i want o DIE DIE DIE, and what is to become of me?
lying in bed forever is too boring.
do i stay or should i go...do i up my dose of neurontin, do i do this or that, i don't want my life to be a jigsaw mystery-solver when i used to have so many other pursuits...in grade 5 i was so psyched about life that i's shower and dress at night before i wnt to bed, so that in the morning i could just pop up and walk a mile to school to happily do my early-morning duty of being a safety-guard.
what happens to the teenage brain?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
oh
oh so dramaticLLY YRS,SAR
poster:sar
thread:12327
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011006/msgs/12327.html