Posted by fluffykitty on September 27, 2001, at 12:10:32
In reply to Getting it all out, posted by Kristi on September 27, 2001, at 2:39:15
>Exactly 1 year and 4 months ago he just picked
>up and left. with a "dear Kristi" letter. HeIm sorry. I feel really badly for you.
>had a dream of being in a band.... he felt he >had it.... ya know, half the men in this world's
>hear his voice... and to think that was >all "fake" on his part... all we shared... just >crushes me. Crushes human faith. What could
>cause someone to do that? I don't know,... I'mI have a few things to say about this.
First it may not have been fake on his part. You dont really know that. With guys I think there are other things that factor in.
One of course is the whole commitment thing, another is how people in general, man or woman, deal with issues about being with someone for a long period of time and what they want to do in thier life. Some people are able to reconcile being with someone and pursuing thier dreams. Others are not. Or maybe they just need some excuse to break it off cause they cant deal with it for whatever reason. Or maybe they are just free spirits who can never belong to anyone.
He couldve just talked to you and said he wanted to do this and continue the relationship on a different level or different way, the long distance thing for a while or you both moving or something. But for whatever reason, maybe one of the above, he chose not to. There is no reason why anyone would "fake" it for 5 years. If anything maybe it was too real. Who knows.I think this is the reason why women after awhile of this when going out with a guy press for a firm commitment within a year and then want to get married soon after. To weed out the potential runaways from the ones who can stay with them. And if they dont then just break it off.
I think for many, perhaps most guys, its not really always the right woman but the right time. It may have been a right woman but it just wasnt the right time.
fk
poster:fluffykitty
thread:11796
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010927/msgs/11811.html