Posted by deerock on October 15, 2014, at 21:30:58
hi there,
i have some narcissitic tendencies, i dont think i have full blown NPD but my therapist says that one of my behaviors is full blown NPD and frankly, its concerning me for three reasons. one because i dont want to get arrested, two i feel like a complete nut and hate myself for doing this and three, the victims in this case are likely being impacted and scared by my behavior.
i broke up w a woman who lives near me. since the breakup of what was a really abusive relationship, sort of sado-masochistic dynamic, i have become obsessed w. her. for the first few days i called her 40 times a day, she didnt pick up mostly, and twice when she did she said do not call me. so i stopped calling fearing intevention from police.
the last two days, i went out of my way to walk by her house. one of the times she saw me as she was driving home (i was not near her home at the time) and she looked enraged. i am not positive she saw me but i believe she did and it seemed that she was really angry that i was anywhere near her house.
i want to stop any behavior related to stalking or harrassing this woman immediately.
what i struggle with is an unwillingness and a perceived inability to stand back from my emotions when i get the impulse to engage her whether its due to perceived mistreatment and seeking revenge or missing her as a source of comfort and soothing. i feel that this is an emergency in the sense that if this behavior continues i could get arrested and i really do not want to. thanks for listening. btw, i am not violent and never have been but i really dont know if this woman is scared of my becoming violent or just annoyed at my behavior, even enraged. whats interesting is that i told her while we were together that i did this a number of times to other women for a short time and moved on, which is true, but w her living so close i think it will be harder to stop.
poster:deerock
thread:1072331
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20140702/msgs/1072331.html